Outgrown Clothes
Recently I was given a lovely, humbling, and hilarious insight. This good fortune presented itself while awaiting a Cyprus bound flight from London’s Gatwick Airport. First the images: I watched a thirty-five year old man who was entirely uncon
scious of his actions: He, in feigned, affected, noisy and labored breathing ‘in a breathless state’ moved in an asymmetrical and slow, attention-gathering gallop as he approached the gate where I stood.
As he pounded his national identity card and boarding pass to the counter, he spoke dramatically in an English that bore the lovely accent of his native country. He requested immediate assistance as he had missed his flight from a nearby gate. In response to each of four kindly delivered responses from the gate agent, he loudly exhaled an exasperated NO! She then informed that no matter how many times he made his pronouncements, circumstances remained the same: Her help is that of directing him to the airline service counter for rebooking.
The man then moved from the counter, stopping in the center of the aisle. He thrust his ID card and boarding pass to the floor and while loudly exhaling, further collapsed his shoulders. There he stood with his head hanging in seeming profound disbelief at his fate. Just two steps away, I, barely containing the incredulity of my insight, and my urge to laugh more audibly, stepped to his left side and stood mimicking his posture. In a couple moments, I turned my head toward him and in a quiet and dramatic voice said, so only he could hear, “Its fucked isn’t it?” I remained a moment longer, then slowly stood more upright…then slowly and silently walked away. Seconds later he collected his things and did the same.
My insight: I do what this man does all the time. I do it differently, of course. Yet, I too, have many unconscious habits of behavior, each with dramas large and small. Mine revolve around being impatient or being in a hurry. After all, I have so many things to do. I often move fast. I am in a hurry.
As I write this, there is a humor surfacing in me that is a blending of at least three mental and emotional states. The first is a delight in my new awareness. The second involves a bit of disbelief for the silliness of my little dramas, and for not having recognized them previously. Lastly, I feel chagrin. The second and the third are themselves examples – equivalences, though less visibly dramatic than the man’s actions in the airport.
As I rotate the prism of my perception, three perspectives vie for my attention. The first involves what I judge as the normalcy of our all too human obliviousness and somnolence: our insistence on remaining imprisoned by trivialities, on remaining dead asleep. The second angle prompts a warm compassion in seeing the plight of my own and others’ humanity. The last view prompts a remembering that I am best served when I see the humor in my own petty dramas, then let them go.
Our dramas perpetuate an embodiment of our having said ‘no’ to our lives and the Mystery. We can ill-afford to continue denying our sovereignty and the experience, expansion and creative expression awaiting us. Life asks us to announce, in an unequivocal and robust voice, ‘yes’ to the Mystery! And then to live out our lives embodying this ‘yes’ – taking all that life offers.
What will rouse me from my sleep?
What will prompt the letting go of my petty and distracting dramas?
What will move me to say ‘yes’ to my life?
What will open me to genuinely experience the immediacy of the Mystery and my life?
What will foster the expansion of my genuine nature?
What will prompt my genuine creative expression?
Thanks….we do seem to “sweat the small stuff” from time to time. We must remember there are reasons for everything…reasons why we love, reasons why we are late, reasons why we are ill….mysteries on a daily basis.
I found this very interesting, Stephen. I was particularly interested in the notion of the three different mental and emotional states. I agree life becomes much simpler and more satisfying when you start reviewing your actions from the outside in, in a kind of Shakespearian ‘player on the stage’ way – it iswith this that you can begin to enjoy all the experiences life presents to you. Thank you for sharing
Stephen,
We are all guity of feeding the SELFish part of our being instead of taking a deep breath
to realize that we can be better than falling prey to the veil surrounding our lifetimes. When we view time in the human sense we set deadlines and roar ahead without living in the moment, only for the future of what will be when we get there. Along the path there are so many wonderous sites that I find even more enchanting. Thank you for bringing to our attention one more aspect of this existance that needs ascention…
Namaste,
Sandy
Wow…inspiring! Here are my thoughts
1. Spiritual awakening/awareness
2. Stepping outside ego
3. Letting go of fear
4. Seeing, hearing and feeling with the inner eye
5. Love, compassion and forgiveness
6. Freeing yourself from inhibitions and preconceived perceptions
”God through Anne Terri With The Holy Spirit: Well written, Stephen. And when one witnesses themselves through another human behavior, life becomes a mirror, and a possible lesson for change. AMEN”
Good story, Steven. I think awareness is the key to losing the dramas. Of course its always easier to be aware of others’ dramas.
Very nicely explained! LOL Yes I can see myself there because I have in fact been there just as he was. I missed a flight because it was changed at the last minute to a gate on the other side of the airport! I had to run with all my might, to the escalator which was three stories high skip every other step, wait for a subway thingy, ride the subway thingy, climb another escalator two stories high, run with all my might to the gate at the end of the terminal only to see the plane in reverse out the window. Yea I dropped and it wasn’t just my shoulders, lol I collapsed in the chair breathing deeply and wondered what had I done to deserve this!!!! I had been pacing that airport for four hours waiting for this flight and it came down to missing it! For what>??? LOL Well, I caught the next available flight the next morning and for whatever reason I was not supposed to be on THAT missed flight- I WILL NEVER KNOW. LOL I did get to where I planned to go, had a nice vacation etc. Yes missing the flight was a petty drama, but my aching muscles and my exhausted lungs to a while to recover. LOL Did I expand my genuine nature? I really don’t know. LOL Did I have creative expression? You damn right! LOL Mystery? Still is… LOL Say “Yes” to my life, well I had no other choice really. LOL Sleep? I had a wonderful nights sleep that night ! LOL Humanity… got to love one another ! We all are somewhat dramatic in this time and space… perhaps at some point we will all look back at the movie of our lives and laugh ! LOL
It is often the case with most, that we are caught up in our petty lives, and so as it may, create the drama we all declare to dislike. Yet we seem to cater to it, forgetting that we are a part of the universe, and that the universe grants us; whatever we deem from our minds and our souls. For what one creates, one will sow and reap. I am often asked; the fundamental question of the meaning of life? And as I explain to those who seek the answer, to which they themselves only know that answer. Life is only the key to the immortal universe; it is there that all that one desires to know; waits for the mind to ask for it. Yet Humanity seems to bend its will around external guidance and struggle, forgetting that the same guidance they are looking for rests within them; without the struggles humanity creates. When the clothes become outgrown, then it is time for a new wardrobe. Where the clothes no longer master the one who wears them, but the one masters by choice; of the clothes to be worn.
Since I just woke from an extra five hours sleep time.. a rare event in my life, I speak from an unusually well rested perspective. Trying to do too much, Getting to a state of being where always being in a hurry and always feeling late causes a sense of impatience to rise within is a challenge that many of us face as we perceive precious minutes slipping away in which to do what seems so essential. I am sitting here dressed in my usual attire but what is more important I am comfortable in my own skin. The world is still pushing me to go faster but for a change I am content to watch it whiz by and am appreciative of a sense of calm.
I did enjoy this!
I think it is fair to say that we all have habits that we are unaware of … it is in becoming aware of, and just accepting our own oddities that enables us to move forward on our pathways. It’s not being too hung up on what makes us unique, both the good and the bad, but trying to see past that and importantly learning to ignore our internal critic – who is always the harshest judge!
I found that learning to slow down, learning to ask myself – ‘Will this matter six months from now? – or even – Will this matter tomorrow?’ soon sorts what is important and what isn’t. Also, other questions I ask myself are ‘If I had just six months to live, would I want to be where I am? Would I want to be what I am doing? Your answers soon give you your true priorities!
Love it!
Great example Stephen….written with the visualization that I have always enjoyed in the way that only you communicate. Thank you for the awareness & lessons shared.
I just love those moments where I see ‘myself’ from the outside, see the silliness of me, then suffer a momentary humiliation that ‘I’ hadn’t seen it sooner (death throes of the self image), then it’s over – and the entire thing is damn funny! Such a great story, Stephen. Thank you for reminding us what living really can be.
Wonderful post Victor! Thank you for sharing. Blessings, Elsie